The Ballad of Jim Bomberg

by Chuck Bryan

(sung to the tune of Kenny Rogers’ “Gambler”)

Chorus:

You gotta know when to sail

Know when to berth it

Know when to tack and jibe

And when to let it be

Never pick up flotsam

That’s floatin’ in the ocean

And never save Jim Bomberg

From the perils of the sea

Verse 1:

On a warm windy day

From a beach in San Carlos

I jumped into my Laser

And headed out to sea

Then the sky turned dark and ghostly

I turned and looked behind me

And there I saw Jim Bomberg

Just a’lookin’ back at me

Well the wind it was a’blowin’

But my boat just wasn’t goin’

I thought I had my anchor down

So I reached to set it free

But crawlin’ o’er my freeboard

Was a wet and windblown Bomberg

I helped him board and then I saw

He was naked as could be

Verse 2:

So I handed him the rudder

Then he began to mutter

He might be speakin’ Spanish

But it sounded Greek to me

His hands began to wavin’

He was strange behavin’

I heard the crack, then saw my sail

Was floatin’ in the sea

Well I found myself a’driftin’

All alone but for Jim Bomberg

In a one man boat that now was filled

With Nature Boy and me

The sharks began to circle

And the land grew very distant

I knew my life would end with Bomberg

Smilin’ down at me

Verse 3:

The day was growin’ colder

And he was growin’ bolder

He started closing distance

Between himself and me

So I grabbed a broken paddle

And set myself to whack him

But a sudden jolt then told me

We’d been rescued from the sea

I found that we had drifted

To Honeymoon Island

With battered boat and broken mast

I felt lucky as could be

But standing there beside me

Was a grinning naked Bomberg

That Cheshire look was all it took

(Mark substitutes "evil" for "Cheshire" when singing this song)

I jumped back into the sea